Theoretically I believe in the possibility of complete healing from stucknesses related to food and body image. And that it will be amazing. But I’m not there.
Where I am now is a comfortable balance between wanting to be perfect and skinny versus wanting to eat all of the chocolate within a 30 mile radius. So it’s not that those desires have gone away…
I guess the difference is that the impulses don’t impress me much anymore. And that shift means I hardly ever feel the need to act out on them. The range keeps getting narrower and easier and the pendulum doesn’t swing nearly as wide from side to side anymore. And hallelujah for that.
But 100% healed, as in cured? As in never eating more than my body needs or never wishing my tush was firmer? Ha! Not so much.
This is related, but I’m not sure how. So imagine seamless segue here.
I’ve been thinking about a book I read forever ago: Why French Women Don’t Get Fat. And for whatever reason (aside from my girlhood love affair with all things French and glamorous), the premise really worked for me. And as I’ve been thinking about my old nightmarish cycle of indulgence following by deprivation, I started wondering why the premise had worked. Because, in many ways, the message is parallel to:
Go ahead and indulge. But balance it out with deprivation.
Except. I realized the author’s message is framed completely different. French women* aren’t afraid of food. They don’t use food, or abstain from food, to punish themselves. Instead, they love to eat. They take pleasure in the rituals of shopping and preparing and feasting. And they see managing their weight and loving food as a pleasant balancing act.
*Ridiculously absurd generalization, absolutely. I’m just speaking to the spirit of the book’s message.
Which all matches up with two of my own Big Important Truths when it comes to healing this stuff:
1. Give yourself permission to eat everything you enjoy, and;
2. Realize that beating yourself up never works: Decide not to do it anymore. And when you slip, don’t beat yourself up for that either. (And so on, and so on.)
Eat what you love, enjoy it thoroughly, and balance it out with healthy moderation is much different packaging than the old:
Eat a wheelbarrow of chocolate and then limit yourself to carrots and celery for three days as cruel, self-inflicted punishment.
Of course I’m not saying that’s an easy switch to make. At all. Especially for anyone intimate with diet mentality. But it is possible. And oh so worth it.
**I think diets suck. (No surprise there.)
To celebrate the New Year, I’m giving a free call with friend and fellow coach Amy Pearson.
Join us and learn a happier way to wellness.
Call details:
Wednesday, January 6th at 9 am PST/ 12 noon EST
Call in: (724) 444-7444, Passcode: 68599
(To sign up for a reminder and recording, click here.)
***And just a reminder… the early bird price for our upcoming teleseminar is good through December 31st. Learn a fresh approach in 2010: Heal your brain (and body) from the effects of dieting.
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